All of us have been wronged at one time or another. And most of us, probably have been wronged quite seriously by someone who has never even considered apologizing or done anything that was sufficient enough to make it right.
One of the biggest hindrances to us for letting that hurt and bitterness go is the conviction, the justified conviction, that justice should be done. It’s the idea that people can just get away with horrible wrongs and deceive everyone.
This hinders our ability to forgive and it allows grudges to develop. We feel that just to let it go would be admitting that justice simply won’t be done and we can’t do it.
So what we end up doing is holding on to that anger and we often play the story over and over again with the feelings of: It shouldn’t have happened; it shouldn’t have happened; it was wrong; it was wrong. How can he be so happy now when I am so miserable? it is so wrong. It is so wrong!
However, if we read the words of Romans 12:19 we will see that these are words given to us by God to help lift that burden from us.
Do not defend yourselves, dearest ones. Instead, step aside from wrath. For it is written: “Vengeance is mine. I shall give retribution, says the Lord.”
Laying down the burden of anger, laying down the practice of nursing your hurt with feelings of being wronged, laying that down, does not mean there was no great wrong done against you.
It also does not mean there is no justice. It does not mean you will not be vindicated. It does not mean they just got away with it. No. What it does mean is that when we lay down the burden of vengeance, then God will pick it up.
This is not some subtle way of getting revenge. This is simply a way of giving vengeance to the one to whom it belongs and that’s God.
It means taking a deep breath, and maybe for the first time in a long time, feeling like now at last you are free to love.